#YellowChocolate

I was supposed to be having a happy february this month due to the difficulties and feelings of January, this is easier said than done. So the playzone was amazing last Thursday and that was perhaps the best day I've had in ages! I think the highlight was the laserquest because I won both games...Who'd have thought the camp Jew would be best with the guns?? Then the whole weekend was shit with the whole being dumped palava. I'm still getting over it but I just want to stop feeling sad. I thought I had got over it last night but I clearly hadn't and had a bit of a downer. I feel so grateful for my friends being their for me, Especially Jolly, because he helps me to not think/dwell on it all. However, I feel so bad ruining their days when they don't have a reason to be unhappy except my misery. Then I apologise which I think must be even more annoying because they just want to be good friends. I let some of my stress out last night by smashing things and gett...

I've been feeling low as of late... By late, I mean the last few weeks... I dunno why, but I think I'm just being silly. One reason, is that friends of mine keep bailing on me due to financial reasons, and then go out on all the days I don't go out... Reason 2 is that I never get to see the girl I love... Another is that sometimes I think I'm a novelty, rather than a friend... 4th reason is that as much as I love being drunk, I'm fed up of being an annoying drunk... Number 5, even letting it all out aggravates me because it seems like I'm attention seeking, and I'm not, it's just there's no one I can talk to really... This is the one that affects me most...I just need someone I can turn to when I want to talk, but there isn't anyone... Also, I really need to lose weight...and get some plastic surgery...and a new neck... Glad I got that off my chest…