#YellowChocolate

As has been the general theme of my vapid last few posts, here I am, looking to blog again, to see if it will do any good. Lets start with an update based on the big milestones I kept missing in my previous posts. It is five years since my previous post, where I was a very naive 25 year old. Yes, I'm in my thirties now. Maturing like a fine wine I hope, but more likely like a piece of cheddar that dropped under the fridge. Back then I was 'still' living at home. I did not know back then that it would be another five years. Last year however, in May I bought my own home. Yes that's right, I'm a homeowner. The years of saving paid off.  I escaped the bully from the old marketing company and after a brief time working in Oxford, I have settled into a SaaS company where the last three years have blown by. I chop and change as to whether there is the right level of opportunity for me there, but I have a good support network there and I am doing something I enjoy; Contin...

Ok, quick post before going into 2018 New Years Resolutions. The only one I kept to on this was number 5, failed the rest. I'm a terrible human being.

I lied, I lied, I li-i-ied. I should have suspected I would struggle to blog 2 days in a row. So lets use this first blog to update on where I am in life right now. Past the quarter century mark and still living at home, I work for a marketing company in an Operations department. It was going along swimmingly until my new manager started bullying me. In the love department, I began a relationship in June of last year that ended by May this year. Still, it was the longest relationship I'd had and I was completely and utterly in love. It's a shame alcohol and prescription drugs were more important to him. And yes, it was a him. My bisexuality has not been cured or completed. So back to being single, in desperate need of a new job and a home of my own. I guess we could say I have the world at my feet. It's a shame that the depression is still so severely attacking my mind. It's still there, counselling begins next week.

So here I am, Friday 6th of October 2017. Signed off work for depression after being bullied and receiving a formal warning with perhaps a 50% justification but with the additional fabrication, and I wonder when the last time I wrote my blog was. Of course it's been over a year, and there is still a draft being written about dream collaborations apparently. We'll get to that later. Do I return? I am thinking it may be a good outlet for my opinions and thoughts and feelings, even if they are never going to be read. Perhaps I will give it a try. More tomorrow on that I think... Hopefully. In the meantime, lets appreciate Chris Evans via GIPHY

Year: 1888 Producer:    Louis Aimé Augustin Le Prince Director:  Louis Aimé Augustin Le Prince What can you review about this? It's a man playing an accordion for a few seconds. But, it is a very important piece from history that if it wasn't made, we may not have the huge wealth of film production that we have now.

Today is International Women's Day, a day that I feel needs to be acknowledged and promoted far more than it is. As a #HeForShe, I think today is the perfect opportunity to acknowledge and challenge the social injustice that for so much time and by so many people, is brushed under the carpet (and probably expected to be done so by a woman at that) Why in 2016 is it still acceptable to pay women far less than men? The fat cats hide behind their masked reasons but the fact of the matter is that they still don't care. Whether you are a man or a woman does not affect your performance in any job role, so why does it affect your salary? And don't even get me started on the opinions of women at work and whether they'll 'up and leave to start a family'. Why is it still common for a woman to be asked about her family plans and why does it matter? Why in 2016 is there still a glass ceiling? You can try and gloss over with excuses but the fact remains that their is no...

So this is what I plan 2016 to have in hold for me. Let's see how many I succeed on this year. Being more ambitious with Jack Union as I edge ever closer, and number 11 is the most important, I must stop ruining my own chances.

Usually I'd have posted this on the 31st December, but I completely forgot, I've been neglecting this blog and I shouldn't be. With 2 completed in 2012, and 3 in 2014, I'm hoping I have completed 4 for 2015 to continue this upward trend, because even then that's only 25% of my NYR. 1. Complete the Second Draft of Jack Union: Ab Initio -  FAILED! 2015 is probably one of the year's I've worked the most on Jack Union. After a becoming friends with Lauren, who worked with us at the beginning of the year and likes to edit books, I had a huge spurt of motivation and inspiration. Finally someone to talk storylines with, specific passages character development. However, it was not enough to finish the second draft. I have approx. 30 pages left to edit for 2016. 2. Keep fit, go to the gym and maintain a healthy weight between 11st 3lb & 11st 6lb -  FAILED! Another failure, but perhaps not as much as I think. Really, at 6' 1" 11st 3lb is not re...

Can someone pleas unriddle this most unusual dream for me and tell me what it means. I was at my old school assembly room with a friend from university planning a circus themed party. We were doing very well, with guests loving these ugly circus people face pictures. People from my school and university years began taking a seat whilst my friend set up the first piece of entertainment. He had stacked up hundreds of drinks in a stair-like fashion, and then had several more on a cuboid clothes rail, which he pulled up on the stage. Then, after a countdown, he shoved the clothes rail one to come down the drinks stairs and into the audience, making an almighty mess. Add in that another university friend was telling me their boyfriend 'Adrian' had bought them a car, and I am truly stumped at the meaning of this dream. BTW, I did have cheese before bed...

There has been a massive critical hatred for Jared Leto's The Joker image that was shared on twitter last week, but what does everyone really think? Personally, I quite like it. He certainly encapsulates the mania and hysteria that The Joker has, and some of the tattoo's are great, but 'damaged' written on his forehead?? Really? The purple glove looks a little ridiculous too, and is not necessary in the slightest. Rumour has it this isn't the final design, I can't wait to see the finished result.

1. Lola Pearce Lola did it. Here's a few reasons as to why I think it's her. 1. Lucy argued with her grandfather Billy, that would piss off this young lady. 2. She was the girlfriend of Lucy's twin Peter at the time, perhaps Lucy thought she wasn't good enough, or she wanted revenge after Peter telling her that Lucy was Ian's favourite. 3. The photos found in Billy and Lola's house, perhaps from Lola, leading to her rather than Billy who we first assumed. 4. Jay and Ben had Lucy's phone and purse, perhaps they are involved to help cover up for one of their best friends. 5. The woman on the bus could be Lola's mum, a new storyline. 6. She's due a juicy storyline. 7. Lucy once fired Lola 8. Lucy may have found out about the kiss between Lola and Jay, and threatened to tell Peter 9. I've just got a feeling. 10. They know she can work well under pressure of a live show. She had a baby in the last live segment sh...

2. The Woman On The Bus Ok, bare with my on this one. I know you're thinking who the fuck?? But let me explain... Click This Link  and you'll find yourself at Lucy's Case file CCTV recordings. Lucy is chased on the bus, by someone who is clearly a woman. Follow the footage onto the bus and the person behind Lucy sits next to Jay. Lucy proceeds to finish sending a text and just as she puts the phone down, this woman picks hers up. Coincidence or not? I think Lucy text her. The woman reads the text and says something to herself, and boy is she not happy. Next thing, Lucy gets ready to get off, looks back in fear to see someone also getting off the same stop, AND THIS WOMAN GETS OFF AT THE SAME STOP. Now, this woman, I don't know who she is. I think she could be the mother of suspect number 1, or Cindy or Kathy back to life, or a mother of a dealer or anything, I just think the scene is so weird she's got to know something! Suspects 75-66  ...

Down to the final 3! 3. Danny Pennant Gary Lucy must be fuming right now. He has twice been introduced to EastEnders as a juicy new character and twice thrown away. I loved his character, he was someone I could relate too. (Bi and a bit of a dick). Each time he was just thrown into relationship after relationship and for this, the most important would be with Lucy. The two of them had a brilliant rivalry when they were working at Butcher's Joints, and it really helped Lucy grow into the business woman she became. However, they grow closer when Lucy discovers Danny is squatting, and they're both fired and re-employed, and they eventually become a bit of a couple. However things start to go wrong for the 'Walford Wanderer' who is also flirting his way with Johnny.  And when they lose their jobs again, plan a business together and start looking for a flat, Johnny has to reveal the bisexual man's naughty ways. This is where Lucy begins to go downhill,...

We're into my top 5 suspects in Part 9 of our suspect list! 5. Abi Branning Abbie has become dark and twisted lately, ever since she and Jay split up. She's already killed the family dog, and she scarily stalked and attacked her own sister on Halloween. Abi knew and threatened Max on his affair with Lucy, and she was not happy about it at all. She is keeping a secret, we know that, between Max and herself, but whether it is that she's a killer we don't know. 4. Steven Beale Has everyone forgotten about the MENTAL Beale? Ok, so he's not Ian's real son, but he is still a Beale. So the last time he was on the square, he send threats as his dead mum to his fake dad, tried to kill himself, snogged his step-uncle, accidentally shoots Jane, and KIDNAPS LUCY! He for some reason hates her, and definitely has form. Who's to say that he was in New Zealand at the time? I definitely think this could be a great plot twist if it was him all along, an...

It's the final ten! part 8 of our suspect list. I don't care that EastEnders has their so called 'official suspect list' after the new year episodes. I still think they're decoys (Lois, Decoys). 10. Ben Mitchell The gay bad boy who's trying not to be gay. He's got form, obviously, as we know with Heather. He was nearby at the time and he and Jay had her purse and phone. He reckons he just picked it up but that doesn't ring true at all really does it. He's trying to cover up something (other than his love of cock) but is it Lucy's murder? 9. Rainie Cross Rainie could easily be where the Beale twins were getting the drugs from, as she herself has been a drug addict. She used the situation of Ian shagging her as a way to blackmail, and a desperate addict can do crazy things. She's a nasty piece of work and I wouldn't put anything past her.  8. Jay Brown Jay, as you'll find out later on, alongside Ben is unusually clos...

Now we're really getting in deep. We're on to part 7 of our suspect list, with some real likely killers and one psycho child. 15. Dennis Rickman Jr. This has to be the worst little shit in the history of fictional characters? He is such a little twerp who deserves a smack. His lies against Whitney pushing him just shows how evil he can be and I wouldn't be shocked in the slightest if he was a murderer. 14. Denise Fox Denise made the disgusting mistake of falling for Ian. How the hell did that happen? She was supposed to be in Oxford at the time of the murder, but that could be a shoddy excuse (just look at Mr Bates in Downton). Lucy actually helped Denise by keeping her kiss with Fatboy secret, and they never really had that much hatred between them. However, she did start to really detest Ian, and she would know how to hurt him, through his children.   13. Nick Cotton Nick is back, again... Whilst that means we've got a couple of months of Dot...

This year's New Years Resolutions. Let's see how we do compared to last year!

2013 I completed 2 of my new years resolutions, 2014 saw me complete 3! Lets take a look back and see what was a success and where I went wrong! Before tomorrow's revealing of my 2015 New Years Resolutions. The tracking sheet that Joanne inspired me on has disappeared but I am going to try and do the same this year! 1. Complete the Second Draft of Jack Union: Ab Initio - FAILED! Jack Union, my ever present fantasy novel got off to a great start at the beginning part of the year but I  somewhat got a little blocked as the year went on. Perhaps it was a lack of free time with On Call and busy work, my nephew being born, or maybe I've just got a little bit lazy and lost my way in terms of my dreams. So of course, this will be back on my 2015 New Years Resolutions and I am more determined than ever to complete it! 2. Produce, Film & Complete The Keys Of Cochyuffern Woods - FAILED! Another dream I appear to have lost my way on, I didn't even write a script! How...

Part 6 of my breakdown of the suspects who could possibly have killed Lucy Beale on EastEnders! We're really starting to get to the nitty gritty of EastEnders. 25. Les Coker Les looks almost as much like a killer as Stan does. He's the undertaker of Walford, and I'm sure he'd be very happy for the extra business if things were failing. We know he's more than happy to bend the rules after the whole Nick thing, and using/swapping/making dead bodies clearly is nothing to him. Then there's the dark history of the death of his son. Pam believes it was all her but could it have all been Les? 24. Cora Cross Cora started off being a great character, and one of my favourites. Fiercely protective of her family and her snobbery over others was highly entertaining, but recently she's becoming vastly dislikable. She was even a shoulder to cry on for Lucy back in the day, offering support when Ian went AWOL. She all but accused Max of murdering Lucy, but c...

Part 5 of my breakdown of the suspects who could possibly have killed Lucy Beale on EastEnders! We've got some murderers in our midst, a couple of bitches amongst us and a potentially disturbed young mind. 35. Phil Mitchell Phil was unnaturally nice to Ian in some real heartwarming scenes towards the beginning of this crazy roller coaster of a ride. It may very well have been from guilt perhaps. Despite Phils's reputation as a 'bad boy' (a term I use lightly considering how hilarious it is when he tries to be hard and the fact that his comebacks are getting worse and worse) he has never actually murdered anyone. Could this be his first? 34. Mandy Salter When New-Face-Lucy returned to the scene, Mandy was shacked up with her father Ian. To say they didn't get along is quite the understatement. Lucy effectively sabotages the beginnings of the wedding, but I think it's safe to say Mandy saw that Lucy was right and stopped the marriage on her own....